- Asad Ali
Why we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others
Why do we compare ourselves to others?
Maybe it is what we have grown up around or perhaps it is our lack of self-confidence? Could be both?
Growing up in Pakistan, comparing ourselves was a standard. When I was younger it was all about who was more well behaved or who had better grades. Not much has changed since, now it’s all about who is making more money or living the “life”. Though, have we ever wondered what we actually get out of the constant comparisons.
Honestly, nothing! Comparisons lead to a feeling of resentment, a feeling of demotivation or just a feeling of embarrassment. If we want to change something about ourselves then we have to make the effort to achieve it. We are on our own journey and here is how we can truly work on ourselves.
The Social Media Detox
How can we best describe our experience on social media - That’s a hard one, right? Social media is the best way to stay updated on what is happening. I’m currently in that age group where everyone is getting married, starting new jobs, or just at the top of the world. As we are bombarded with these updates it is by nature we start to compare. This triggers our self-doubt and frustrations and we begin to compare our own worst moments to someone else’s highlights.
Is this really how we want to use our energy and time?
Do we want to focus on our own self-development or sulk about someone else’s life on social media?
It is ideal to take a break from the noise and limit our time spent on these social channels to focus on what truly matters. YOU!
Accept other successes and get inspired. Your time will come #EarnedNotGiven
Only compare yourself with you
If you’re going to compare yourself to someone then do it to yourself.
It is normal for us to end up comparing ourselves to others. However, it is important to take a step back and acknowledge the journey we have been on and what we have achieved.
We are all unique individuals and our journey will always be different to others.
Turn your comparison into inspiration. We tend to focus on success but not on the hours we’ve spent preparing and working for that goal or achievement. This is our opportunity to get inspired by the process and the journey. There is no progress without failure and reflection. We are always told to work hard but it is equally crucial to work smart and that’s something we forget.
Here are a few ways you work smart
Focus on tasks that make a higher long term impact first
Schedule your time for specific tasks and not deviate from them #shamelessplug read my blog on how to plan your day
Know when to take a break and recoup your energy
Don’t wait for motivation, just do it #nike
Work in 60-minute blocks, 50 minutes of work with a 10-minute break
Take the weekend and think about what inspires you.
Nobody is Perfect
Remember nobody is perfect and trying to be perfect is not really a solution. The goal is being able to adapt.
Surround yourself with curiosity and an open mind. As you get inspired learn to humbly ask questions from people you look up to.
Get out of your comfort zone and set realistic goals you want to achieve in the next 2-5 year
#shameless plug 2 read my blog on goal setting However, if comparisons are a continuous tendency in your life, introduce positive prompts to influence these negative tendencies.
These positive prompts could be
Writing down 3-5 things you’re grateful for
Highlight 3-5 key strengths you have
Tell yourself positive affirmation (one of my favourites is “I am worth it”)
Remind yourself to be happy and celebrate others success
Get yourself inspired to compete with yourself
We need to accept our flaws and imperfections.
Acceptance is key! Free yourself by embracing that you’re perfectly imperfect.